twentysomething in twentyten

1.13.2010

Dear MOL,


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So get this- I'm randomly going through my facebook friends and realized my mother in law is still on there. I also imagine that by her last status update on 1/6/10 she knows i'm on her friends list....b/c I get the sneaking suspicion the comment was geared to me. And as all things in life are, if you're meant to get a message - YOU WILL.


So without further delay, the status update read, "Thank God my son is finally moving on. But remember what goes around comes around." Of course the first thought that crosses my mind is obviously, "well that's good news, he took the plea deal..." Then I catch the second line again about "what goes around comes around" and again she is absolutely correct, except where she thinks that i'm the one getting the "comes around part" she's a bit mistaken and I am more than glad to clear this up right here and now.

Dear MOL,
I loved your son more than I ever believed to have loved anyone else. He brought out my strengthes, supported my weaknesses and provided stability. He made sure I was always taken care of and at the time, I thought he was the love of my life. We fought like any other couple and made love more than any couple. I married him without hesistation or resignation. I took your family name and embraced your family as if it were my own from birth. However, what I failed to see after some time behind those rose colored glasses was that your son did not love me in the same way and despite the fact that he loved me, he wasn't "in love" with me. Plain and simple, he fell out of love with life. Whether you know it or not, I lived alone in our house for over a month hoping he would come back. Praying he'd remember I was his family. I didn't sleep. I barely ate and I lost a lot of weight. And when he didn't come back I let go.


THEN after several weeks came a break in the clouds and I caught my breath again. I embraced my future and I moved forward. And by taking that step an old friend help put back the pieces your son did such a good job of pulling and tearing apart. Your son and I may not have worked out, but there's no need to push negativity in anyone's way b/c you're blind to who your son is. The incident in August wasn't the first, it was simply the last. He has a history of violence and unfaithfulness and TRUST ME this plea deal is the best chance he had from the start and instead of trying to lie to make me look like the agressor he should've taken responsibility like a man for his actions. Shit, he would've been done by now. But you can't see that I imagine. B/c he's your baby and i'm the bitch who pressed charges. What can I say, "It is what it is." If you had a daughter you would understand.


So again, I agree with you "what goes around, does come around." However, I should remind you that he was the one who hit me and left me on the floor, so for his sake I hope he can defend himself better than I ever could.


Lastly, I'm not angry or feel threatened; in fact I'm grateful for your little note b/c YOU finally gave me the forum to speak my mind.


Sincerely,

KM

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